Why I Quit Playing Games With Guys

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Growing up I was taught how to play “The Game,” (thanks to The OC, Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill, The Hills, etc…)

And for those of you don’t know what “The Game” is, here’s basically how it goes:

– You meet a guy/girl
– You drop subtle hints of attraction
– You flirt, but not too much
– You tease them, leaving them wanting more
– Maybe you even flirt with their friend, just to make them a bit jealous
– You text them, but not too much, and definitely not too fast
– You keep them on their toes by acting like you’re always busy
– You act like you don’t care

….So, basically, “The Game” is a whole lot of little mind games piled into one.

And supposedly, this game will guarantee that the guy you like will like you back!!!!!!!! SCORE! THANKS MARISSA COOPER!!

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K no.

“The Game” works, yes – but it only works temporarily, and it’s frankly degrading.

Note: See my article on being the “Cool Girl”. 

“The Game” also, (excuse my language), fucks you, and the other person, over – guaranteed.

When you’re playing “The Game”, you’re a version of yourself that isn’t genuine.

The moment you decide to play “The Game,” you’re already losing.

“The Game” forces you to present a front that denies your true feelings, pressures you into keeping cool 24/7, convinces you to lie at great lengths, and suppresses the wonderful personality you actually have.

“The Game” can be fun at first (c’mon, being a tease can be quite the thrill), but once that initial attraction fades, and the lead-on is over, you’re probably going to get ditched.

Here’s where it gets risky: People who love “The Game” might only like you because of that very reason – because you’re playing a game that they want to win. Think about it – how many times have you heard about guys who chase after a girl and then once they hook up with her, are no longer interested? The truth hurts.

I guarantee that happened because some serious GAMES were being played, and neither person was ever acting like their real self.

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After two people hook up, and the chase of “The Game” fades, all that is left are two liars and an awkward morning after.

I then would like to suggest that we stop playing “The Game”.

Yes, some aspects of the “The Game” can be helpful and hot (depending on what type of “relationship” you’re looking for), but, if you actually find yourself REALLY interested in someone – why not try to be the f*cking realest you’ve ever been.

Tell that person straight up when you want to see them.

Tell that person straight up that you like them/ are interested in them.

Tell that person you want to go on a date.

Tell that person you want to kiss them – right now.

Tell that person that you want them to stay the night.

OR –  tell that person you want zero commitment and actually mean it.

Speak your mind.

Figure out what you want and ask for it.

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Now, I know these things are all easier said than done, but why not try just one ballsy move – just one piece of straight up/ right to the point honesty?

If the other person is someone worth your time, they will respect your candidness, and will likely like you better for it.

‘Cause honestly – I personally think it’s super refreshing to hear the straight up truth for a change – and you might even end up with the deepest or most rewarding connection you’ve ever had.

Ps. Jenga & Monopoly are still allowed.

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