Lives for blinds, bugs, and all things dangly.
Thinks I can’t see him (when I can totally see him).
Watches me get naked.
Drinks out of the toilet even though he has a water bowl.
Takes off his collar like he’s some sort of rebel looking to “get lost”.
Bites my toes from under my bed, (then licks them to say sorry).
Sticks his head in the glass of water I just poured for myself.
Winks at me… well actually I think one eye is just lazy.
Gets poop stuck to his butt and makes me get it off cause he “can’t reach”.
Walks across my keyboard while I’m typing – he gives zero shits about my future.
Get’s disappointed in me when I come home drunk at 2am/ Sizes up my boy when he comes over.
Tries to eat my hair.
Pushes all the litter in the litter box to one side like he’s making a sandcastle.
Thinks there’s another cat living behind the mirror… Runs around the house looking for clues.
Goes from “aw baby” to “you little sh*t” … in seconds.
Licks my plate before I’m done eating.
Paws at my nose, attempting to suffocate me in my sleep.
Ignores me when I try to talk to him about my day.
Doesn’t realize windows have glass.
Scratches everything. (Fire mixtape coming soon)
Get’s down to Drake. Believes he’s the 6Cat. #Blessed
“Hey palejacket, thanks for the shoutout” – Bank$
